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Mar
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2010
My Cell Phone Hates Me, or Maybe It Hates My Friends Posted on 10:24, March 17th, 2010 by Small Town Mommy
Today is Wednesday and it is What the Hell Wednesday. You would think that with the beautiful spring weather we are having, I should have nothing to complain about. You would be wrong. Last week, Joanna sprained her ankle. I took her to get it X-rayed. For the first time, the X-ray technician didn’t ask if there was a possibility that I might be pregnant. How devastating is that. Apparently I looked my age and that was before daylight savings had eliminated any opportunity for sleep. By now I must look like somebody’s grandma. At the Small Town Middle School, the kids decorate each others’ lockers for birthdays. I am not sure whose genius idea that was, but, I will find out and make them pay. When Libby decorates a locker, she requires someone to bark orders at assistance. What the Hell?!? I get to go to the middle school to help decorate her friends’ lockers. It’s not like anyone decorated my locker on my birthday (I don’t even have a locker). The sacrifices we make for our children (sigh). I even have to shower before I go so I don’t embarrass her in front of her friends. My cell phone was not designed to be used as a phone (or maybe it hates me). It has all kinds of bells and whistles including email, Internet, texting, GPS, etc., but somehow, whenever I talk to anyone, I accidentally put them on mute. I can’t figure out how I do it so I can’t figure out how to undo it. I always have to hang up and call back (if I can figure out how to hang up) What the Hell?!? It has phone in the name, why can’t I talk on it. I could go on, but you probably have other things to do. If not, head on over to Blue Monkey Butt to check out What the Hell Wednesday for a tour around the Internet. It is like seeing the world without having to leave your bed.
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I can’t figure out my phone either. Also, looking like someone’s grandma isn’t half bad (at least for me!)
Happy St. Patrick’s Day.
That X-Ray technician must need glasses. I’m just sayin’.
Poor Joanna! Hope her ankle is feeling better!
That’s too funny that someone ‘mandated’ the decorating of lockers for birthdays – two of my friends and I used to do that all the time in Jr. High…we were known as the Terrible Notorious Trio (aka TNT) so we’d leave a cartoon drawing of dynamite on the front of the locker to ‘warn’ the owner of the locker that they wouldn’t find their books inside, but a birthday cake and confetti.
I never made my mom help, though – you ROCK for helping out! 
I wish my phone had all those bells and whistles – I really need to get a Smart Phone one of these days. But I’ll be sure to make sure it’s smart enough not to mute whomever I’m speaking with…*snicker!*
Happy St. Patty’s Day! And yes, you absolutely deserve a kiss even if you don’t wear green!
The X-ray tech should take her cue from bartenders. You always ask to see ID. Even if the lady is a wrinkly 75 years old. The bitch!
No good deed goes unpunished. It was a grand thing that you did and it was not for naught. I am sorry that you had to take a shower though
We used to decorate each other’s lockers in high school. I would have been completely mortified to have my mother come in to help. Every time I get a new phone, it takes months for me to figure out the features.
Well that x-ray technician sure knows how to brighten a persons day…..NOT
I don’t know how to use half the stuff on my phone that’s why I just make calls and forget the rest.
I am so glad I am not the only one who can not figure out how to use their phone. I got a nice new shiny red one, and I hate the thing. I have very small hands, and I still can not hit the right teeny weeny buttons, really what do women with big hands do. I want my old one back. Plus it is a pain to answer. I have to hit the stupid green button twice, rather than once, ugh. As for the locker thing, well I think you know what I would say LOL.
Ha! I was asked if I could be pregnant when I got my knee x ray. I burst out laughing when they asked me.
You are one nice mom. There is no way I would ever go and help a child decorate someone’s locker. Mainly because I would have to shower and not embarrass her.
I have the same kind of phone, I don’t think I have muted anyone yet but someone was playing with it last week and since then the phone doesn’t ring. I’ve played with all the setting but could not figure it out. My son took one look at it and switched a button on the side. It shouldn’t be that difficult.
I don’t get carded anymore, which is awful because at most stores it says “If you look under 40, we will card you”. Crap, I look a hell of a lot older than I am. My phone doesn’t do anything fancy, but I’ve heard of the same problem you’re having…..it has an “I” in the name
Thanks for joining us today!
I hate my cell phone, too. Don’t feel bad! Oh, thank goodness my kids don’t decorate lockers for birthdays. I don’t think their school would let them.
The publicist’s cell phone is so old it does nothing much more than take phone calls…
I hope Libby’s ankle feels better very soon. It’s good you are not pregnant, yes?
I hope you are going VERY early before school starts or late, long after it ends so that you don’t embarrass your daughter while you are decorating her friend’s locker.
hee! hee! I love kids and the stuff we do for them.
Locker decorating? I guess it’s a girl thing.
I just had to upgrade my iPhone software again, and now it is working pretty well as a phone (which is still the worst feature out of the 1000+ things it can do.)
Too bad about Libby’s ankle, but kids do manage to heal so quickly.
Vixen, my youngest is 7 so I am hoping to have plenty of years to look like a grandma.
Stacy, and that’s why I love you!
Buggys, you are so right. Always ask, even if you know it isn’t possible.
Michelle, the shower was the worst part.
Cassie, I was mortified. She is still too young.
Ann, I am having trouble making calls. That is the problem.
Melissa, I have small buttons too and I sometimes hit the wrong one. Back space is my best friend.
Jen, they asked you if you were pregnant because you look young and gorgeous. Since we are the same age, I obviously just look washed up.
Stacy, my phone doesn’t have an i in the name, it has a roid.
Lisa, I wish the school wouldn’t let them decorate lockers.
Pricilla, I had a phone that just took phone calls. I hated to talk on that one too.
Lin, we have to go very early (again, showering is an issue).
Tina, if you don’t get your locker decorated, you look bad so birthdays become very stressful for some kids.
I had forgotten about decorating lockers!!! You always prayed someone would do it for you, because if they didn’t you were the LOSER. And yes, I had times when it wasn’t decorated. See the big L on my forehead? You are a GREAT mom to help with the decoration. A Martha Stuart of Lockers!
For lack of sleep, try eye depuffer roll-on…or the Benefit line of eye brightener. I usually put cold teabags on my eyes for 10 to 15 mins., then put the depuffer so I would look like awake and not looking like a grandma….hehehe….
Try taking the phone to your carrier. But most oftentimes, people working there only know how to sell phones but never know how to troubleshoot. Or read the manual.
I put people on mute too. If I hit the center button while I’m talking it mutes me. Hit it again and I can hear them. WOrks great when my mom is lecturing me about needing to put my kid to sleep. I mute it…yell at her…then unmute it. One day I’m going to screw it up and really get in trouble…
Katherine, that is the big fear, that no one will decorate someone’s locker. I am hoping that someone will do hers when her birthday comes.
bingkee, thank you for those suggestions.
Lisa, I just can’t figure out how to undo it. I think I hit buttons with my face.
I;m seriously about to blow my cell phone up. I only use it for 3 things, Texting, social media (Non-internet just SMS) and OCCASIONALLY talking on it and lately it just cuts right off in mid convo. I don’t know if it’s my phone, where I’m sitting in my house or karma, but it’s a bitch.
Glad Joanna’s ankle is only sprained, sorry the tech didn’t ask the “could you be pregnant?” question. Imagine Joanna’s embarrassment if she had.
It’s awful to go from being the person your children love most in the world to being the most embarrassing person in the world. Eventually it shifts back the other way, after you’ve been to hell and back.
Thanks for joining us for WTHW..sorry I was so late commenting.
Julie, I use my cell phone for the apps. Although it works pretty well when I use it in the car (and am not actually touching it).
Elle, Joanna’s too young to be embarrassed. If it isn’t about her, she really doesn’t care.
Locker decorating? I’d be peeved to have to shower for that…particularly if it wasn’t even my kids locker…
You might look in to a second phone…you know, for actual phone calls.
Trying to keep up with technology is sometimes harder than keeping up with my kids.
Loved your rant!
I have similar issues with my cell phone. The only way I dont accidentally MUTE people is by putting them on speaker!